Fake it till you make it!

Here is another one about me and my experiments on my 4 year old son Dhyann.

I have a little outgrowth on my left ear. It’s a birth defect. Or, should I say, it’s a gift. It is something that has always drawn a little extra attention towards my left ear. As a child, I used to enjoy telling my friend that… 'its because Im soooo smart that my intelligence is not able to fit inside my head, and it just oozed out from me ear!'

So, the day finally came when Dhyann asked me, ‘Papa, why do you have a tiny little finger coming out of your year?’ Now, what would you say to that?

Often, the best ideas in the world, come on the spur of the moment. Or at least, so it seems to us. I believe, the truth is that our subconscious mind has been cooking the idea up for many months or even years. Suddenly there is a thought, question or an event that triggers it off. Just like a tiny toothpick can burst a ballon, the trigger even makes the genius idea suddenly appear, seemingly from nowhere. It seems spontaneous, but it been lurking around in there, waiting for its moment.

That day genius struck me when my son asked me that question. Pat came my reply, ‘That little thing in my ear is actually my champion button!’ With a naughty smile, I followed it up by adding, ‘why don’t you press it and see what happens…’. Obviously the little lad was super thrilled at the prospect of pressing Papa’s ‘champion button’. How cool was that!

And so he did. With a huge smile, albeit a little tentatively, he pinched my little outgrowth. Immediately, I raised both my hands up in air enthusiastically and yelled out loud "I’M A CHAMPION!"

Now for the second coming of my genius! Cunningly, I told him that he too can have a champion button :-) I told him to just raise his hands in the air and yell ‘I’m a champion’ when I press the button in his ear. And that’s exactly what he did.

And we have played this little game 100’s of times since then. At least once a day. Sometimes when he has had a fall and he is crying in pain, if I just press his ‘button’, he will instantly stop crying, fling his arms in the air, and yell the magic phrase :-)

OK, so what, you may be asking. Here is a little science for you. According to social psychologist and Harvard Business School professor Amy Cuddy "your body language shapes who you are". Her extensive research shows that body language can affect testosterone (the hormone linked to power and dominance) and cortisol (the stress hormone) levels in the brain and can change our feelings about ourselves. That means that standing tall and proud even when we don’t feel it, can actually change the way I feel. And the way I feel about myself, influences my ability to relate with people, handle emotions, delay gratification, handle distractions, and so on. It literally shapes who I am and how I live.

The simple pose of holding up my arms in a V-shape of victory, standing tall and wide, and lifting my chin up, can make me feel strong and powerful. My humble addition to Amy Cuddy’s idea of a ‘Power Pose’ are the words ‘I’m a champion’. Words, when repeated, and especially when accompanied by actions, can make a deep impact on my sub-conscious mind. That is the very basis of Neuro Linguistic Programming. I’m simply leveraging the power of repetition of words and actions to program Dhyann’s sub-concsious mind to make him see himself like a champion.

Is it going to work? Only time will tell. But I can tell you one thing, he loves make the champion pose and yelling out loud ‘I’m a CHAMPION!'. It certainly gets us all in a great mood every time we do it together!

With loads of Love and Gratitude,


To see Amy Cuddy’s TED Talk click on this link: https://www.ted.com/talks/amy_cuddy_your_body_language_shapes_who_you_are?language=en