I was just walking down the road that runs along the river below the space where I work from. I needed to extract myself from the thick soup of energy that seemed to have flooded that place. Sometimes that happens. I feel like I'm drowning in my own boat. The very boat that keeps me afloat, takes me places, and from where I earn my meaning and livelihood, is sometimes the boat that I want to jump off, abandon and fly away from, far far away.
I’m not a mother. But I wonder if the mother of 7 pups ever feels like just abandoning those little suckers! Imagine it, all 7 of them stuck to her teats, pulling and shoving, yanking at her until they get a stomach full. And then they want her to play with them. They jump on her face, lick her nose, and dodge her feet. Cute? Yes. But there must be a part of the mother’s heart that wants to shake them off and run free.
Sometimes I feel like a mother. People around me feed on my energy and positivity and ideas. I am not boasting. It’s the truth. I believe it's a natural phenomenon that happens to all of us. We humans have a hunger for energy. We feed on others energy. I do too.
And I believe it’s a beautiful thing. To give and to receive. To be a mother is a glorious feeling. To be able to provide nutrition, warmth, love and hope to another is a wonderful feeling. It’s a very female experience. The female-ness in each of us can feel this when we give, when we allow another to take freely from us, when we share openly what is ours, and when we love and support another. When we allow ourselves to be open and vulnerable. It is a motherly thing to do. We men should do it more often. Its empowering. Too oneself.
But it's also draining. Energy is a resource and no one is endowed with unlimited quantities. Hence, one’s supply tends to drain. And that’s when it is important and even necessary to distance oneself, and find own space to recharge and revitalise. You have to re-fill your tank. And you have to find ways that are not dependant only on other people. Else, soon you will have nothing left to give. And sometimes if the tank is empties all the way to the bottom, even the pump stops working. You hit a deep abyss. A huge amount of effort is then required to get the tank filled up once again.
Don’t wait to hit rock bottom. For all you beautiful people out there, every now and then, please make sure you shake off and reenergise. Fill your tank. Find yourself. Do your thing. And then once again, give freely. That is what true strength is. That is what mothers are made up of. Sending a bow of respect and a big hug to all the wonderful and amazing mothers out there!